Marjorie

“David’s new amante.”

When I was retired by Greenpeace a few years I had many plans for my future. One of them was to buy a large van, convert it, then live, travel and work from it.

Have van will travel.

Now I have Mercedes, or rather “A Mercedes” otherwise know as Marjorie.

Why did I wait so long? Many reasons:

1. I had some long distance travel to get out of my system.

2. I had recently had confirmation that my last ex wife categorically refuses to sell our family home and split the proceeds to enable us to each both buy a small house. 

3. At 70 it’s impossible for me to get a mortgage. 

4. I detest having to swell the coffers of rich bastards by paying them rent. 

5. The pandemic left me in a state of flux from which I couldn’t see an easy escape.

Sea versus land?

Many people have asked me why I didn’t get a sailing boat, given my 50 years of experience on the sea.  Boats are like holes in the ocean into which you pour money. This was great when I was paid to do it and somebody else was picking up the expenses. Now I would be paying for everything. Bugger that. 

 You could argue that will be the same as my van. True but at least I won’t sink!  No, I’d decided a long time ago that when I left the sea it would be forever – notwithstanding ferries for travel of course!

Simple pleasures

I already practice minimalism and have whittled down my possessions to bare essentials. The only exception to this philosophy are my carpentry tools. They constitute about 75% of my worldly goods and chattels. And of course they will be going with me in the van. This way I can also work my way round Europe. 

I will now spend two months fitting out Marjorie. And I know somebody out there will say that’s way too optimistic. Perfectly correct response.  However, I just want to get it to a stage where I can sleep in it then travel – after all, I will have my tools with me to finish it, and do all the fiddly bits, on the road.

Why two months? August will be exactly two years since I last saw four of my children and, bugger it, I miss them. If anybody has a problem with me travelling then, tough shit.  

Never say never

Some of our pedantic readers will re-call a previous blog of ours where we set out our plans for the future. Nothing changes by me getting Marjorie. I will still be satisfying some of those long distant itches. She won’t mind being laid up while I’m away in impossible to reach locations. She’ll probably welcome the break.

Oh and Gionny will be designing my solar energy suite plus all my comms needs. Won’t you mate?  

Some of you familiar with my sometimes disrespectful style of writing may think my choice of Marjorie is a pejorative, discriminatory and rude use of a now rarely used name. I’m perfectly happy for you to continue having those opinions. Oh, and, by the way, Marjorie is actually my mother’s name.  

Wish me luck!